Thinking About Having An Affair? Relationships, Marriage And Infidelity Do Not Mix!

How many times have you seen it happen? A marriage goes through a really tough patch and you find that either the husband or wife is having an affair. Relationships in a marriage that’s in trouble are complex enough without the added hassle of spousal infidelity rearing it’s ugly head!

And, it’s not only in marriage that this occurs. Long-term relationships also suffer from the same plight! So, why does a spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend cheat on their partner? Kind of like asking the unanswerable question isn’t it? There are many reasons why people either have, or contemplate, affairs outside their relationships.

To make it a little easier to discuss, let’s just look at one scenario that might be a major contributor to infidelity in relationships and the possible (probable) outcomes of your behavior.

Be Clear On What You’re Doing Before You Start An Affair.

Thinking About Having An Affair? Relationships, Marriage And Infidelity Do Not Mix!
Thinking About Having An Affair? Relationships, Marriage And Infidelity Do Not Mix! photo credit: Foxtongue

Affairs, relationships with people outside your marriage, or long term relationship, are often more appealing than staying faithful to spouses and partners. Clandestine affairs are new, exciting and a reminder that you are still vital and desired person.

The need to satisfy their “ego” is the main, compelling reason why so many people find themselves having an affair.

If you’re considering having an affair, your relationship is about to become difficult for you, whether that relationship is your long-term one or the affair you’re thinking of starting. You might believe that your relationship or marriage is bad right now, but just wait until your partner or spouse discovers you’ve been cheating on them. You’re in for a real shock!

Your spouse or partner will feel betrayed, angry and devastated. Yes, infidelity will decimate your marriage or relationship.

Can You Avoid Having An Affair?

Instead of turning to someone outside your relationship or marital situation, remember the promises you made to one another. No marriage or relationship is without problems. The challenge is to work at remaining focused and committed when these problems strike. So, turn to your spouse or partner instead of some seemingly appealing outsider.

Thinking About Having An Affair? Relationships, Marriage And Infidelity Do Not Mix!
Thinking About Having An Affair? Relationships, Marriage And Infidelity Do Not Mix! photo credit: PinkMoose

Explain clearly to your spouse how you feel. Just because you’re feeling this way about the relationship or marriage doesn’t mean it’s the same for them. They may very well have no idea you feel the relationship is in trouble. The only way you will know for sure is if you communicate openly and honestly with your partner or spouse.

It’s vitally important that you both take the time to listen to each other. Don’t judge and criticize each other. This will not make either of you feel you can be truthful about your feelings. If your spouse feels they are going to be mocked or humiliated, then they will clam up. And so will you!

Do Affair Relationships Last?

If you have already embarked upon an affair, then you need to weigh up what you really want. Maybe your marriage or relationship is well and truly over. You’ll only know this if you sincerely examine how you feel. There’s no point, for either you or your partner, in staying in a marriage or relationship that’s simply not working.

If that’s the case then the answer, as painful as it may be, is to end it with as little damage as possible to either party.

Affair? Relationships? Either way, they both take time and effort to develop and maintain. While your new and exciting romantic interlude might have your head spinning right now, you need to ask yourself do relationships that started out as an affair last?

Think long and hard about the problems in your marriage or relationship. Is what you share with your partner worth fighting for? If it is, then you must do everything in your power to avoid having an affair! Relationships can be greatly rewarding, but only if you’re willing to work at it.

Thinking About Having An Affair? Relationships, Marriage And Infidelity Do Not Mix!
  • http://raymondbork.com/ Ray

    Hi, I know from my own experience how damaging an affair can be in a relationship. My wife told me she began an affair because she was lonely!

    That admission came as a complete shock and a wake up call for me. My marriage did survive, but not until we had gone through a lot of heartache in rebuilding trust.

    You are right, communication is the key. Don’t just talk,but genuinely listen to what your partner is saying to you. Together, you can then work through issues that may arise.

    It took me about two years to really recover from that traumatic experience. Today our relationship is stronger, but only because we worked hard at it!
    .-= Ray´s last blog ..3 Of The Biggest Complaints Women Have About Men! =-.