Getting over someone who has hurt you isn’t easy. You believe the pain will never stop. Can you mend your broken heart? Will you ever fall in love again?
These questions, and many other nagging, painful thoughts plague your every moment when you’re trying to work out how to get over someone cheating on you.
Anyone who’s been in a relationship ruined by infidelity will tell you it’s probably the hardest of all situations to be in. For most people who have been cheated on, their self-esteem can hit an all-time low!
Coping with Your Feelings when Someone Cheats On You
Any trust you had in your partner has all but gone, and your emotions bounce somewhere between sorrow, disbelief and anger. So, how do you get over someone who has cheated on you when your feelings are all over the place?
Sometimes, jilted lovers start to believe that they have caused the breakup, even though their partner is the one who cheated in the relationship. Feelings like this are wrong, and need to be dismissed completely!
Getting over someone who’s been unfaithful to you starts with allowing yourself to feel the pain. And, there’s nothing to be ashamed of if you want to cry. You must work your way through your emotions in order to feel better.
As mentioned before, at some point in the whole process, your sadness will possibly turn into anger. And that’s fine! However, the way you deal with the anger will highlight your level of maturity in the handling the situation.
Of course, when you’re dealing with infidelity, you could choose to pull all sorts of nasty pranks, or paybacks, just to get even for the hurt your ex has inflicted on you. But, ultimately, you’ll only end up embarrassing yourself. This definitely isn’t what you need or want! And, it isn’t how to get over someone cheating on you.
A much better and more mature way of dealing with infidelity is to channel your anger in a more positive manner. For example, sit down and compose a letter to your ex, detailing how they hurt you. Let them know exactly how their cheating and deceit made you feel.
Leave no stone unturned in your description of the devastating effect their unfaithful behavior had on you, and the emotional pain you are experiencing. By all means, give your ex both barrels!!
But, here’s the kicker, DO NOT post the letter!
Instead, read it out loud to yourself, then tear it up, cut it up or burn it. Just make sure you destroy it somehow. There’s some kind of finality, or closure, about watching your words, and your anger and frustration go up in smoke.
Many experts say that, psychologically, a ceremony like this allows you to grieve what you’ve lost, then be able to move forward with your life.
Dealing With Infidelity – Dump Your Cheating Lover!
** The no-holds barred approach. Just let go! Don’t dwell on your decision, and don’t entertain any imaginings of getting back with your ex. Simply move on. Be confident that breaking up with your ex is the right thing to do, and that there is someone out there who is better for you.
** Keep any contact with your to an absolute minimum. You might have things such as trinkets or clothing that you’ve left at their place, or vice versa. If possible, get a friend to pick these things up or drop them off. If not, arrange with your ex to meet somewhere neutral to make the exchange. Keep it brief and cordial.
** Whatever you do, do not hang out together as ‘friends’. This is a huge mistake. Even if you and your ex run with the same group of friends, by continuing to associate with him or her, it gives the out the signal that cheating on you was O.K. – and it’s not!
While the above point may be difficult to manage, you’ll soon know who are your true friends.
** Get back in touch with friends and family. Sometimes, when you’re in a romantic relationship, your other relationships become neglected. But, after your breakup, make the time to re-kindle these friendships that are there for you no matter what.
** Get back into the dating game! It stands to reason that going out, and dating again, might not be high on your list of priorities following a messy breakup. However, once you’ve worked your way through the shock and pain of being cheated on, putting yourself back on the market may be the best medicine.
Get back on the dating scene slowly. Since your ex is no longer the center of your life, you can begin to get some perspective. You can figure out what qualities you want in your next partner, and what it is that you will and won’t tolerate.
As stated at the beginning, how to get over someone cheating on you isn’t an easy problem to deal with. Everyone copes in different ways. Hopefully, some of the above suggestions will be of some benefit should you ever find yourself dealing with infidelity.